how i handle the days i don’t feel pretty

First of all, I want to say that in our society we tend to always want to be perfect due to models, hollywood, and social media. And as soon as we notice something we don’t like about ourselves (could be a pimple, a bad hair day, under-eye circles, or bigger issues), it can completely ruin our mood.

One small detail and suddenly the whole day feels ruined. We start questioning everything, our clothes, our face and (for me) it can transform myself into an aigrie bitch angry at the world

When those days happens,

This is what i try to do :

First, I lower the standards (on purpose) I tell myself : “Today I don’t need to be beautiful. I just need to be presentable and feel okay.” I put on my fav sweatshirt or confortable clothes. Paradoxically, the simple act of no longer trying to “perform” already makes me feel better. Because i do not need to put on makeup those days, and ending up dissapointed because it doesn't look as good as usual.

I also try to change the lighting. I know the bathroom mirror with its cold, unforgiving light is my worst enemy on some mornings. So I go to a room with natural light, or I look at my reflection on my phone. Because sometimes it’s just a matter of lighting. It literally can completely shift how I see myself. I remind myself that even professional photoshoots carefully control the light for a reason and that's kinda why some models looks ethereal (also because they are extremely beautiful) but it is also due to constant controlling.

I focus on what my body does, not what it looks like I remind myself that this same body has walked me through long days, carried heavy problems, laughed, enjoyed life... I thank it out loud (yes, even if it feels a little weird at first). It breaks the negative internal dialogue that is fighting inside my head. Instead of criticizing the shape of my face, the texture of my skin, or how my stomach looks like today, I try to appreciate the fact that my body is still showing up for me every single day and that i need to be grateful to still be there.

One big change : I limit mirrors and selfies when I feel ugly, I reduce the time I spend looking at my reflection. No checking photos, no scrolling through old pics or comparing myself to past versions of me. That's one of the thing that made me develop an ed, so i can tell you : the past version of you isn't the better version of yourself and I'm pretty sure that time you were still insecured of how you were.

What I’ve learned from my little 19 years of existance (lol)

Is that feeling pretty is not a permanent state, it’s a feeling that comes and goes, just like energy, mood. Some days the mirror is kind, other days it’s ruthless. And that’s okay.

I’ve realized that so much of the pressure we feel comes from the idea that we must look good all the time in order to be worthy of attention, love, respect, friendship.... But your worth has never depended on how you look in a particular moment.

So,

On the days I don’t feel pretty, I practice being gentle instead of critical. I practice presence with my family, friends, love ones, and my own self, instead of performance. And slowly, those days become less about “fixing” myself and more about simply existing.

Because at the end of the day, I am still here

Be carefull and kind with yourself